With the school year starting, you want your child to be successful from the beginning and your child’s bedroom is the best place to start. Create a space for everything in the room (e.g. a spot for reading, homework, creative arts, dressing/clothes, etc) and make sure that the space is defined and easy to identify. It’s important to remember that you are helping your child, follow his or her lead and what makes sense to them.

Struggles between parents and children about getting organized are common, but altogether unnecessary. Organizing together is a rare opportunity to learn how your child thinks, to share their goals and dreams, to discover what’s truly important to them.

Helping your child master the skills of organization can actually offer a means by which the two of you can build a relationship, or strengthen an already existing one. Use the following strategies to ensure that your organizing project brings you and your child closer instead of into conflict:

·         Don’t insult your child. Eliminate the phrases “You’re so disorganized!”, “You are such a slob”, “This room is a pigsty!”, “You are such a procrastinator!”.  Build your child’s confidence by recognizing the areas where they are organized.

·        Avoid pre-judgments. You can’t tell just by looking at their space or notebook whether or not your child is organized.  Ask what works for them and what doesn’t. You may be surprised what you learn.

·         Respect your child’s own way of thinking, goals and attachments.  Maybe you’d group shirts by short and long sleeve—but your child prefers to group by color or style.  You might be a morning person, while your child is a night owl. As long as their system works for them, support it.

·        Reinforce their commitment.  If your child gets overwhelmed or discouraged, remind them of their reasons for wanting to get organized.  Remember, children must get organized for their own reasons, not just to please you.  What are they trying to get out of it?  What’s the payoff for them?

·        Pace your child. Help your child mastermind and prioritize a list of all the areas they want to organize. Encourage them to focus on one area at a time and complete it before moving on to the next.  One organizing project per semester is more than enough.

Most important, be patient, encouraging and confident in your child’s ability to succeed.  Don’t expect instant results – becoming organized is a process, mastered and refined over a lifetime. But do remember that organizing and time management are life skills (not talents) that can be learned. You can facilitate your teen’s mastery of these life skills…even if you never learned to get organized yourself. Read this book alongside your child—it may help you organize your own life!